Realizing the selfish side of you is not an easy thing. Only
other people can judge someone’s personality. In a love affair, there is no
measure that someone is considered selfish or patient.
Assessing others is easy but difficult to recognize our own
mistakes. In Relationship, you can easily give a series of evaluations to your
partner. However, have you ever done the opposite?
Every relationship needs a balance in order to go healthily. Your partner may understand and succumb to any conflict with you. But if suddenly he/she decide not continue the relationship, it hurts.
Selfishness is one of the most frequently discussed
problems. These following below are characteristics of selfish people in Relationship.
Do you belong to it?
1. Always want to be heard
The first characteristic of selfish people is that they
always want to be heard but never want to do the same thing to their partner.
During this time try to remember, when was the last time you
listened to your partner carefully without interrupting?
It’s natural if you want to be understood and listened to
when you have a life complaint. However, not doing the same thing to your
partner is a big mistake that needs to be corrected immediately.
Your partner must also need someone who can listen to when afflicted
with problems and you are one of the people. Be more sensitive, listen well,
and respond according to the story.
2. Always being right
When you building a relationship, there are two people with
two heads and have two different arguments. The characteristics of selfish
people are those who always feel that only their opinions matters.
Now, have you ever felt that way? Have you ever given space
for your couple to think and listen to their opinions?
If all this time you are always forcing your will and
assuming all the decisions made are true, it is only for yourself.
Unselfish couples are those who are looking for a middle ground
in trouble when they are at different opinion.
3. Not considering about the wishes and needs of your couple
In a healthy relationship, usually each couple will think
about the needs or pleasure of their partner. Conversely, selfish Relationship occurs
when one party does not apply to each other.
An easy example, you really like Japanese cuisine while your
couple don’t like it. But in every date, you always have to go to a Japanese
restaurant without asking your partner first.
Simple things like this really show your selfishness in a
relationship. Try to be a little more sensitive and reduce your selfishness by
thinking about what your partner likes.
You will never lose doing this. This makes your relationship
stronger because you understand each other and care about each other’s wishes.
4. Keep silence when angry
According to Marni Feuerman, a marriage and family
therapist in the United States, silencing your partner when you feel angry can
make them depressed. For you this might be the best way because you are too
lazy to talk.
However, how can the problem be resolved if it is not
discussed? Couples are not psychics who can guess your wishes. For that, talk
carefully, find the cause of the problem, and find a solution together so that
one characteristic of this selfish person is no longer attached to you.
5. Threatens to break up
In this world, not all the things you want can be obtained,
as well as in a relationship. When you threaten to ending a relationship every
time you don’t get what you want, you are a selfish person. It could be that your
partner does not grant it because it is bad for you and the relationship is
Remember, not everything you want is the best. When you are
in a relationship, you must be more open to differences of opinion and desires.
The best solution is not to threaten to break up or divorce, but to find a
middle ground so that both parties are equally accommodated in both wishes.